


hymn (him)

by musashee



Series: poetic justice, put it in a song (probably) [1]
Category: EXILE (JPOP)
Genre: JUST, M/M, gay gay gay gay gay, relationships, sex is implied
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-11-06
Updated: 2016-11-06
Packaged: 2018-08-29 09:55:54
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,168
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8484913
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/musashee/pseuds/musashee
Summary: You'reorderintelligencegracepoweri'm a savage





	

**Author's Note:**

> got inspired by variations on the word love by margaret atwood  
> thought i should write something down

He comes home earlier that you. Most of the time.

When he doesn't, you start doubting yourself, even if he told you about the work he had to do.

You sit in the dining chair with an empty glass you would hold onto for 40 minutes, and the beer wasn't cold anymore

You sit behind the couch and listen to the white noise at the end of your cassette tapes

You stand in front of the door practicing what to say when he comes home so that you could treat him right

You read your chat histories with him and thinking about what went wrong

Nothing went wrong

walked back and forth between the bathroom and the sofa

You're just being stupid again

 

He comes home earlier than you.

He sits there on the couch, saying "hey" when you threw your cap on the coat rack, accidentally knocking his jacket off and you picked it up

A gentle bit of deodorant with soap.

You walked over to him and bear hugged him from the back, nuzzling at the crook of his neck, ruffling his soft hair.

he always pushed you away but you keep doing it.

when he puts on new music you always dance until you do obnoxious moves that involve poking him.

 

You said you were taking a bath but you were just watching his slender back when he carefully slides the razor down his chin

Eyes down at his boxer briefs that emphasized his butt

The one you grabbed and kneaded when you make out with him

Your face is shamefully red when he said "you're gonna pay for the bills this month, ain't it."

And you laugh back like an idiot, he went out the door

And with the hot water hitting on your shoulders

you laughed

you kept laughing

you were just crying

 

You always have to build up the courage to say that over the phone

haunted by the fact that someone was watching you

"I-I love you."

"moron."

 

_It's me_

_It's you_

_I'm stupid_

_I'm perverted_

_You're smart_

_You're handsome_

_What am I_

_sinner_

_What are you_

_saint_

_I poison you_

_You heal me_

 

"Don't go."

He kisses you on the neck

and you kick away the sheets

run outside with only boxer briefs on 

he's gone

 

_brown eyes_

_soft hair_

_high cheekbones_

_defined lips_

_lean torso_

_nice ass_

_skinny legs_

_slender hands_

"Don't think too much."

You kiss him on the nose and walked out the door with your eyes shut.

and you cover your face to let it spill.

 

_The gentle smile on your face_

_I take the watch off my wrist_

_..._

_this ain't us._

"Hello?"

"H-Hey."

"Why you calling now? Something happened?"

You were crouching in the corner of the bathroom and you fucking hate the suit pants being so tight against your skin, "N-no."

"You're almost done right?"

"They said they're gonna do 2 more hours."

You only heard that song he was playing on his record player and you stomach started churning.

"I-I miss you."

You hear him shift around.

"I-I just want to hear you talk."

"Are you feeling better then?"

"Y-yeah."

You hear him laugh at your reply. So airy that it sent shivers down your spine, "I've been sitting on the sofa for 2 hours. thought you gonna come home an hour ago."

"O-oh."

"Do you want anything for dinner?"

"They prepared food for me but I didn't like it."

"You didn't answer my question, god damn it."

"I-I'm alright with anything."

"Hm okay."

You tried thinking about something to talk about, "H-hey."

"Hm?"

"My balls are uncomfortable."

"really. that's what you wanna tell me?"

 

_I'm bleeding_

_I think I cut myself_

_I just want to know if I existed_

_I can't find bandages myself_

_I don't know where they are_

_where are you_

 

one

 

he kisses you lightly

you see his eyes in the dark

you could feel his warmth

his legs straddling you lightly

(in this position you're straddling him too, somehow.)

his hand

your hand

touching each other

 

two

 

him on top of you or you on top of him

gravity decides

 

grinding against one another

boxer briefs down

you get the lube from the drawer

his hands on your neck

he touches you, soft, loving.

you touch both him and yourself

dirty

friction

 

three

 

You feel his fingers gripping onto your hair

a bottle of lube in the crumpled sheets

licking and caressing

probing

sliding your hands around his lean abdomen

and listening to him

curse gently

whimper a little

say your name over and over again

and you gave it to him. 

he kissed your neck and you hear him hum

you thrust at a slow rhythm 

he cradled your head

 

and he starts swearing again when you speed up

holding his slender legs up

you mumbled his name

he pulled you closer

grip tighter

you closed your eyes

tongues touching

 

his hands

your eyes

became soft

 

and then water hitting marble

 

"i love you."

"i love you too."

"i want to go downtown with you."

he hummed.

"and dance to records."

"i'm rusty."

"no you ain't" and you tickled him.

he laughs. "stop it."

 

_"he was in love, with a thug, in love"_

_"mama i'm in love with a gangsta."_

_i'm a thug_

 

you spooned him

pulled him closer to you.

arms locked tightly around his waist

so that he couldn't go to work

and a few minutes later he grabbed your hands

not letting go

 

_You're_

_order_

_intelligence_

_grace_

_power_

_i'm a savage_

 

it was a long time ago when you two just met

you trusted him easily

he doesn't give in yet

he's skeptical.

until that one night when you two were lying on the sofa together

he buried his face in the crook of your neck

and you want to stay that way

tangled together

you don't have to be naked

 

but people cannot morph

 

_I'm blind in one eye_

_this ain't some shit i'm quoting from_

_you need to guide me around_

he has his arms around you waist and his face against your chest when he sleeps

you know he's still there with you

 

_i'm drowning_

cameras flash at you

a microphone in front of you

someone's talking

you gave a stiff smile

and you hear him whisper in your ears

"do you really care about us anymore"

and your smile dissolved into a puddle of god knows what

 

_am I treating you well_

_am I giving you enough_

_are you content_

"i'm tired"

you were too.

 

"i miss you."

he hums back.

 

"i need sleep."

you hug him.

 

_i'm drowning._

_you came and kiss me._

_we're both drowning._

 

"c'mon wake up."

"no."

"we've been layin' for 2 hours."

 

_you was laughing_

_i was laughing_

_we didn't care anymore_

_we were drowning_

"i don't want to work tomorrow."

"me neither."

"i-i mean, it's that feeling. you get sick of shit."

"it's getting stronger."

_drown together_

_jump off a cliff together_

_die together_

**Author's Note:**

> i'll just keep this one alive.  
> i hate structured shit.


End file.
